"There are ways out. There is a light somewhere. It may not be much light but it beats the darkness" -Journey of our student who wishes to remain annonymous

I was hesitant to write it because I do not know a secret to success and now that I have achieved my goal it does not mean I can boast about it. The fact is: I made so many errors along the way and faced failures & learned from them.
They provided a necessary growth. I am writing this only because I was in your shoes last year. I hope I can help many friends out here. I know how it feels.
My Journey is that I graduated and moved to a new country (not the USA) away from everything and everyone I knew. I took exams and scored 240 plus in my usmle but still, it took me 4 years to match. I missed 2014 ERAS /2015’s match (multiple reasons), I faced visa rejections in 2015, could not take step-3 or gain USCE, away from home country-distances cost loss of a five-year-long relationship. Next year when I applied again. It went unmatched 2016. Dark days, very dark…days. These setbacks happened back to back and it convinced me that I was a poor decision maker and a failure. Depression and negativity surrounded me & people started to avoid me. I lost friends and myself & almost my mind.
This was the turning point. I learned to pick myself up. I lost my fear.
The good thing about rock bottom is that you can only go up! I had nothing more to lose. 4 years of Isolation became a gift. I reflected over my mistakes, became my own best friend. I worked harder, reached out to people for help, for mentorship, improved my CV as much as I could. Gained extensive hands on USCE, that helped improve my interpersonal skills, learned how to be tolerant, calm and professional. Sometimes I got embarrassed while learning new things but I had lost hesitancy and fear. I cannot write down my story detail but I will share things that can be helpful to others:
 
Do not give up & Do not think scores are everything.
I learned that Scores are not everything. I met so many people. I know them very well. Close contacts. It has been an amazing experience. I have seen people with 210, 190s matched. I saw 17-year-old grad matched. Btw people with a green card and had research on CV. Still did not match. I know people w/ attempts who pre-matched next year. I know people who have double 260, and one with 258 unmatched. All of them are friends. I am in touch with them. We matched this year. Do not give up.
What is giving up? = not improving your candidacy. Thinking no matter what you do you can’t match. Or I do not have connections. (Read below)
 
All-Rounder: I went unmatched: What should I do next? Research or USCE.
Program want: On CV they want everything. A Little bit of everything. Step-3, hands on USCE, Research. Most importantly they want someone to vouch for you.
AKA strong LOR. How do you get strong LOR? Invest time in building relationships. That's when USCE and research play an important role. Get recommended.
Impress them. Show hard work. Otherwise, no amount of rotations or research would help. What is the point if they can't know how good you are. Go an extra mile. Add what is missing from your CV whether it is research or USCE. But make yourself known. Be visible when doing a rotation. You 'll be visible by your work and work only. For me, game changer was my USCE and things I learned from my failure. I got Letters from the program director & one of the programs told me they like my LORs.
 
Lose your fear: It paralyzes you.
You can only go up from here. Fear humiliated me. I missed so many opportunities. When you face your fear, you find a way to overcome it. Do not be afraid of rejections. Email people for mentorship. You will get rejected a lot of times but God/fate/life will offer you chances, know them, take them.
During my observership: I read about my patients despite not being able to present them, on a regular basis. It was frustrating. I was going unnoticed. But one day a visiting attending came from a prestigious university. I sought permission from my resident and presented him, patients.  Later, he accepted my request to do a rotation with him at his University which does not even allow IMGs.
I also got a research position by asking a physician who came for noon conference.
Guys, it's out there. We just got to take a step.
 
It is Just an observership. I can’t do much.
Solution: Be a team player.
Once again. Your perception becomes your reality.
You set your own limits. I learned this lesson, after doing first few terrible observerships last year. I had no guidance and I take full responsibility for that. Learned a lesson that: Do the dirty work. When given a new task, figure out a way to do it on your own. Do not wait to be spoon fed. Impress them. This shows you are dependable. Present one article per day. Go to the ER with the resident help admit patients. Show up on weekends, on Christmas break (my attending noticed it). I literally chased the attending and begged to present patients. No EMR access? No problem. Gain confidence of the team they will let you write labs on a piece of paper. Know about patient inside out. See they do not care what your scores are or can you present or not. They want to see how professional you are and how eager you are. I was told by people that you have ended up in ICU block and that you would go unnoticed. True. It was busy, no regular rounds, open ICU, attending would come and go so fast and you can't present or touch the patient.
Guess what? I presented, I touched patients, I got even recommended for the program and was told by PD I will be ranked high-via email. Make friends, be nice to the nursing staff not because you want to match there. Be genuinely kind. I would do a fist bump my attending. Yes, make friends. Be yourself.
(otherwise, it becomes obvious why are you being nice and it is not cool )
A nurse called program director and told how polite I am towards everyone.
Guys, you never know.!!
One more tip:
Never try to outsmart your seniors when presenting cases.
Discuss /share with them before you present it to the attending and ask him or her to help you get noticed by the attending.
 
I do not have connections, I cannot match w/o them.
Answer: True. But guess what. You build your own connections.
One of the most talented residents I have worked with. Brilliant scores but got in a program by recommendation only. On the other hand, a guy at the same program with low score and attempt. Chairman took him to the PD and said I want this person in my program. When you work hard, you get noticed.
 
Do exercise daily:
It is an antidepressant. You never know. You'll look fresh and positive to everyone. I actually met a program director at GYM during my observership. Next day he came sat next to me on a breakfast table in Cafe. He liked me that I keep a work - life balance.
Have good Hobbies on your CV. My PD and I talked about Comic characters.
She turned out to be a gamer who has virtual reality at home.
Chief resident and I read same books.  These small things help :)
 
A mistake from last year about Interview prep and CV.
Last year I had a poor CV full of grammatical errors & no interview prep.
What a disaster. This time: I used Grammarly and asked native English speakers to help me fix it. I prepared an interview with USMLESarthi & Dr. Zeeshan Mansuri.
Zeeshan is a very good guy. I did my first mock with him. He Treated me well like a friend and bluntly told me about my mistakes. Helped me use better vocabulary. And told what things to avoid. I think after that I was able to express myself better. I gained confidence. Actually, he said: If you think you are not good enough why should I believe you are a good fit for the program. It made me lose all fear I had.
Later on: I did a free mock interview with a local agency in my new country/ province (it has its own requirements to select candidate). They were like can we make your video so that it can help people improve interview skills. I had become that good at it but. Guess what? I still blew up a pre-match interview despite being ready. Because I wanted it so bad that I messed up. Learned my lesson. I went on remaining interviews that if it's meant to be it shall be. I nailed them. In fact, where I matched I did well on the interview.
 
We as a human end up comparing our journey.
We have different Journeys. Some match within 2 years and some take 5-6 years.
Life has a way to find its balance. A resident who matched but lost a family member the same year. We can’t compare our lives. Success is a very lonely road. Think of USMLE as a long journey. It will give you patience. It will happen: when it is bound to happen. Luck plays a huge role. You will find yourself at a right spot at a right time when it is your time. Till then, work on your weaknesses.
May you achieve your goals quicker than your expectations.
 
Most important: You are not a failure:
It is a necessary growth. You will see when you match next year.
How much growth you achieved while striving. You will become humble, tolerant, patient and polished. You'll realize how strong you are. You’ll learn patience. And you will always help others when seeing them in pain. Use this time to spend time with loved ones, show self-compassion (most important) and improve candidacy.
I matched to a better program compared to last year's interviews compared to my friend’s program who matched earlier than me. Wait for your turn patiently and be happy for others. Try not to compare lives. Stay humble and work on you CV with passion. In fact, help others. It comes back when least expected.
Do read these quotes if you could.
Ayrton Senna:
I'm very privileged. I've always had a very good life. But everything that I've gotten out of life was obtained through dedication and a tremendous desire to achieve my goals... a great desire for victory, meaning victory in life, not as a driver. To all of you who have experienced this or are searching now, let me say that whoever you may be in your life, whether you're at the highest or most modest level, you must show great strength and determination and do everything with love and a deep belief in God. One day, you'll achieve your aim and you'll be successful.
 
Charles Bukowski:
“If you're going to try, go all the way. Otherwise, don't even start. This could mean losing girlfriends, wives, relatives and maybe even your mind. It could mean not eating for three or four days. It could mean freezing on a park bench. It could mean jail. It could mean derision. It could mean mockery--isolation. Isolation is the gift. All the others are a test of your endurance, of how much you really want to do it. And, you'll do it, despite rejection and the worst odds. And it will be better than anything else you can imagine. If you're going to try, go all the way. There is no other feeling like that. You will be alone with the gods, and the nights will flame with fire. You will ride life straight to perfect laughter. It's the only good fight there is.”

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